One of my major
objections to the suggestion that I become a permanent deacon as this concern:
the gap between me and the people might increase.
I am not like the members
of the parish or the people among whom I live. I have access to money. I am
living on my social security which is more than enough for life here but is
much more than most people earn. I have a US passport and can go there when I
want. If I wanted to escape the situation here, I’d just get on a plane and fly
away. I have an education, access to the internet, and other tools for
learning.
My question was – and
still is: As a deacon am I widening the gulf between me and the people around
me? I have access to power and privilege that my neighbors never have.
But even more, I know
that people already leaders in the church – men and women, young and old. Would
I be pushing them aside?
But as I read, prayed,
and discerned, I began to see the wisdom of the words of Pope Saint Paul VI in
his Apostolic Letter Ad pascendum, 15 August 1972
The
Second Vatican Council supported the wishes and requests that, where such would
lead to the good of souls, the permanent diaconate should be restored as an
intermediate order between the higher ranks of the Church's hierarchy and the
rest of the people of God, as an expression of the needs and desires of the
Christian communities, as a driving force for the Church's service or diaconia towards
the local Christian communities, and as a sign or sacrament of the Lord Christ
himself, who "came not to be served but to serve."
A driving force for the diakonia of the church. The Spanish
reads “inspirador del servicio, o sea, de la diaconía de la Iglesia” –
the one who inspires service, or, the diakonia of the church.
I began to see myself and what I have been doing as a way to “animate”
the community. I am not replacing their ministries but, hopefully, inspiring them,
driving them forward.
And then I read Deacon
James Keating has written in Forming Deacons:
The
deacon possesses no unique power by virtue of ordination but possesses a
mission in being sent by the bishop; he evokes from others the power that is
theirs by baptism.
This as a critical
dimension of my ministry. I consider it very important since this can be a way
of empowering the laity, letting them assume their baptismal call to be
prophets, priests, and servant-kings.
Yet I struggle with this.
I like to teach and I have certain ideas about ministry that some here might
find difficult to understand. I have therefore not involved local leadership in
the training of catechists. This is what I hope to do this year.
I do a lot of training of
the catechists. Last week I had a training of catechists – more than 103 came,
about 20 of them new. We have a seminarian who finished his studies with us for
a few months. I had him give a short talk and lead some song and activities.
What I really want to do is find three to five people who can help with the
training sessions which we’ll have the rest of this year.
But what I have been
doing to helping them develop a participative methodology and a pastoral sense.
They have been all too much influenced by a top-down style of teaching where
the teacher or priest has all the answers and all they have to do is repeat
what they are told. They also have had a very legalistic sense of the church
and applied regulations in very rigid ways. Slowly, I see them moving forward.
Since my ordination I have
been trying to help organize and train those involved in social ministry. I the
past some of restricted this ministry to raising funds for the church. But I’m
finding many are developing a broad understanding of this ministry.
Last Monday I had a
meeting of those involved in social ministry. About 28 arrived. I decided to share
with them some ideas on the role of the ministry as well as what can be done.
What amazed me is how they shared what they were doing. I felt more like a
person giving them a place to look at their ministry, not in isolation but with
others. I was in admiration and urged them to learn from each other. I, of
course, had suggestions, but often they were already doing much – visiting the
sick, raising funds for the needy, planting trees and cleaning up the villages.
I can offer them motivation, providing a place for sharing, as well as helping
them to reflect on their ministry and deepen their faith.
I also accompany the communion
ministers, especially in their monthly meetings. This past week we had an
amazing event. Tuesday, I took a group of 8 communion ministers and the
seminarian to San Agustín. The communion minister there has been visiting a
large number of persons who were ill or home-bound. But she has been ill
recently. I don’t know here the idea came from, but we decided to have a group
come and do a day of visiting. I suggested February 11, the World Day of the
Sick. It was energizing for all involved. With guides from San Agustín, they
visited about 32 people. When I saw they didn’t have sufficient guides, I decided
not to go out and visit. I stayed at the church, praying and reading.
I had my concerns that
becoming a deacon could distance me from the people. This is a danger and a
temptation. (Some would name this the temptation of clericalism.) But I have
found that the grace of God has helped me to deepen my commitment and put me
more in contact with the people, especially those on the margins of society.
It’s not easy, but I’m
learning. But more important, the grace of God can do marvels, even with those
who, like me, come from a place of privilege.
I will close with this photo that someone from Honduras Amigas took of me last year when I was with their medical brigade in one of the villages.
I love this photo because I am not the one in charge. The Honduran man is showing me the way.